A Great Article on Porn and Strip Clubs

We are working so hard to normalize sexism as something that is an innate part of masculinity and I’m just not quite sure why. If we can imagine that it’s possible for people not to murder one another or imagine that there be an end to war or child abuse or whatever other kinds of behaviour we’ve agreed, as a society, is unacceptable, or, at least, undesirable, why are we so avidly working to preserve sexism?

Why are we so unwilling to see porn or strip clubs or prostitution as something invented by a society that is not egalitarian? Just because you get an erection when you see a woman being objectified onscreen doesn’t mean women deserve to be objectified. And I don’t say that because I have a hate-on for erections, or masturbation, or penises, or even sex (though some women hate all those things and that’s perfectly fine). But because I can separate men from misogyny. I don’t believe that your erection is dependent on my subordination.

And you know why? Because I don’t believe you were born an asshole.

Red Light District

Look, Kitten, I am Too a Feminist - Fauxminism and Men

This is a great article about male allies - what they should and should not do.

Street Harassment

Great article.

Scotland on Rape - "No, Not Ever"

Transcript:

A scene of a party. A pale blond woman in her 20s stands talking to two men, one pale and one with darker skin. She wears a black top and sparkly blue skirt, and all parties hold drinks in their hands and appear to be having a good time.

Woman: (laughing playfully) You’re terrible! (laughs) You’re so bad! Shut up!

Cut to two presumably white men across the room.

Man One: (looks at woman, sucks in air between his teeth) Check out the skirt! She’s asking for it.

Man Two: (laughs)

Cut to scene of the same woman in a department store. She pulls two skirts off the rack, one the sparkly blue skirt she wears at the party, and takes turns holding up each one to her hips. A sales assistant, a pale middle-aged woman, walks up to her.

Sales Assistant: Can I help?

Woman: Yeah, thanks. I’m going out tonight and I want to get raped. (smiles) I need a skirt that will encourage a guy to have sex with me against my will. (holds up each skirt again)

Sales Assistant: (smiles eagerly and folds arms across chest) The blue one. Definitely the blue.

Woman: (nods and smiles)

Woman turns and directly faces camera, with a sarcastic look on her face.

Woman: As if.

Male Voiceover: Nobody asks to be raped. Ever.

more at The Curvature

Effects of Street Harassment

We have recently moved to a big city. My sixteen year old daughter is afraid of taking public transportation, which I had THOUGHT would be so liberating for her after four years stuck in a tiny town, because of the way men treat her on the street.

And it is a big deal, it’s a big thing. Don’t minimize it. What, are we just supposed to accept that we have breasts and asses for the purpose of immature men to ogle at and touch without asking? Is that supposed to be something that’s just ‘okay’ with us because ‘that’s the way it is’? Fuck no. I’m not asking the moon and stars here.

"Why Even Street Sexual Harassment is Hard to Get Over"

Love This

Love this!

Via the Carnival Against Sexual Violence:

These are all fairly minor events but they each illustrate this assumption that men believe it is okay for them to touch a woman, to grip her hands, to pressure her into going with them to wherever they want to go. This sort of mentality, that of control, is the first step, the beginnings of the idea that men should be able to tell women what to do, they should be allowed sex, they should have access to women’s bodies whenever they want.

more at

"So I'm Pretty. That Doesn't Obligate me to Sleep With You"

Finally, A Push-Up Panty for the Penis (NSFW)

Finally, A Push-Up Panty for the Penis (NSFW)

No, seriously!

I Wonder How Much Laundry the Average Team USA Dad Will Do?

via sociological images, which I LOOOVE.

Tide laundry detergent company wonders how much laundry the average TEAM USA mom will do. Those of us who are into gender equality think....

I Wonder How Much Laundry the Average Team USA dad Will Do?

Cupcakes for Men. No, Seriously. Cupcakes for Men.

Cupcakes for Men. No, Seriously. Cupcakes for Men.

Unbelievable. Everything has to be certified masculine (sort of like certified organic) before men can join in.

Emotional abuse is Heart and Soul Mutilation

Emotional abuse is Heart and Soul Mutilation

Wonderful article on emotional abuse.

"Shaming and Blaming"

"Shaming and Blaming" via the "this ain't living blog." Really good! My big thing was that we were always told to "sit like a lady." This meant keeping one's knees together, of course, I would like to know why now, today, at a movie theater, my husband spreads his legs wide open and invades my space while I make myself smaller and smaller. I read some analysis that said the whole concept of space - where women are encouraged to take up as little as possible, while men take up as much as they want - is actually all about power.

What Have we Learned Today?

Today, we learned that not everyone is like my fellow sociological bloggers and me. Much-liked old friends from high school may not enjoy a discussion like the ones we have here on their facebook pages. Hmmm - should I put up a new label called "live and learn?"

Penny Red: Carnival of Feminists, 23/12/09: Tidings of Comfort and Joy

There is great stuff at the new Carnival of Feminists.

Penny Red: Carnival of Feminists, 23/12/09: Tidings of Comfort and Joy

A Great New Post From Twisty

A new post from Twisty over at I Blame the Patriarchy.

I started hearing the phrase "man up" about a year ago, I guess. What the hell? I hate it. Like "having balls," "manning up" has no female equivalent. Of course, no one congratulates a woman on showing some real ovaries (well, actually, I have been known to do so from time to time) and no one tells a woman to "woman up."

Cheating Husbands' Bingo Card

I wonder why this comes out with a huge space at the top. Damn you, HTML (shakes fist)

I made a terrible mistake. It was a lapse in moral judgment.	You're too controlling / sickly / busy.	Everyone knows I love my wife, who is beautiful / smart / the best.	It was so flattering. I couldn't help it.	I guess I wasn't sure I wanted to be married anymore.
I fucked her, but I didn't love her.	I thought I loved her, but I didn't fuck her.	You know you're the only one for me, baby.	I guess I thought I just didn't deserve you.	Well, she wanted it. I kind of felt sorry for her.
I guess I was jealous that you were becoming so successful.	Really, my family means everything to me.	“I don't know …”	It only happened once.	I don't know why it happened. I only know it won't happen again.
It isn't you baby, it's me.	This is the first time it's ever happened.	I was drunk / stoned / sad / lonely / depressed.	I didn't feel close to you since the baby came / your mother died / you started school.	It has nothing to do with our life together.
I guess I was starting to feel old. It was flattering.	I tried breaking it off, but she kept calling me, like "Fatal Attraction."	I had her hang out with us so she could see how happily married I am.	You KNEW our marriage was unhappy at the time. What did you expect?	Hey, wait, it's sexist for you to point out that all the men you know have done it!

OH, you MUST be Kidding!

SitCom Role Reversal

You know how every sitcom has a hot and together wife married to an incompetent, oaf of a husband? What would it look like with the roles reveresed? This shows how the stereotypes are insulting to both men and women. In fact, I have long thought that this genre in particular is unfair to men. Who ARE these men who can't cook or clean or remember a wedding anniversary? These male characters don't represent any men I know.



from Sociological Images.

h/t feministing.com

abyss2hope: Carnival Against Sexual Violence 82

abyss2hope: Carnival Against Sexual Violence 82

Apparently, I am waaay behind on my reading. Please check out the previous carnival as well.

abyss2hope: Carnival Against Sexual Violence 83

abyss2hope: Carnival Against Sexual Violence 83

Please do check it out.