Friday, February 29, 2008

Dear Sister of NOLAradfem and Certain Other Clintonites

Dear Little Sister of NOLAradfem:

Welcome aboard! We are glad to have your assistance (of course, we do strictly mean your assistance, as women are, of course, not equipped to lead)!

Thank you for helping to circulate our emails about Barack Hussein Obama being a Moslem, the son of a Moslem, the stepson of a Moslem, the son an atheist, the stepson of an atheist, an Islam denier, a liar, a Moslem candidate ready to free the Middle East from the Great Satan, a former Moslem student paying to attend a Catholic school in Indonesia, an anti-Semite, a black militant, and the parishioner of a profanity-spewing, black militant, anti-semite, Methodist preacher who is clearly a racist because he points out that the U.S. is a white, racist nation; that Obama calls a Kenyan woman with a very black face (photo helpfully included) "Grandmother;" that he is the product of racial mixing, the descendant of African slave traders (because, as all we all know, the really bad slave traders were the Africans themselves, so American slavery was their fault); that he wants to get us into war in Kenya (because even though he opposed the Iraq war, he is indeed just itching to get U.S. troops into Kenya!); that he lied about his WWII vet grandfather teaching him flag etiquette when he was two years old; that he won't say the pledge or put his hand over his heart during the national anthem.

Even though we also have at our website articles claiming that domestic violence protection orders discriminate against men; that a woman can't be president ever because it's unconstiutional; that hetero, Christian, white males are oppressed; that the Clintons are murderers and cocaine runners; that Pell grants discriminate against the middle class in favor of the working class; that the proposed law banning cops and soldiers convincted of domestic violence from continuing to have employment that involves firearms is another example of discrimination against fine, heroic men; that radical feminism is ruining the world; that global warming is a hoax and Al Gore a fraud; that John Kerry must be impeached, since under the constitution, no traitor may hold public office; that the ten commandments must be displayed in all public buildings and that all American governments, state, local, and federal, must immediately adopt a resolution stating that this is a Christian nation and that the wall of separation between church and state is a myth; that the "pro-Hanoi" actions of Senators McCain and Kerry caused the death of one of our soldiers; that John McCain is a traitor who broke under torture and has been programmed as a Manchurian candidate...even though our website says all of those things, none of which you agree with, we are heartened by your taking the time to forward our anti-Obama hatred to your friends and family members (not to mention glad that you didn't first bother to research us and our websites! who remembers the google anymore anyway! whew!)

As you might imagine, cramming that much contradictory crap into one email was quite a bit of work, so we're grateful for your help in forwarding it to as many people as possible. It's true we don't usually make common cause with people like you, Little Sister of NOLAradfem (liberal, feminist, pro-Clinton, believer in the separation of church and state, all that kinda stuff).

But, you know, when it comes to sliming and destroying that Obama dude, we reichwingers will take all the help we can get.

Thanks again for your blind support. We look forward to serving you beyond January of 2009.


1 comment:

George "Loki" Williams said...

That was lovely! Would you be interested i doing a guest post on HumidCity? If so get in touch, my email addy's on the contact page.

Haven't laughed that hard in awhile...